Today I had the pleasure of teaching fourth graders at Fort White Elementary School for forty-five minutes. I don't know how the children felt, but I had fun! Here's how the narrative story teaching went:
Me: Stay out of the mall in your stories. They are generally BORING! And not only that . . . GET OUT OF YOUR HOUSE INTO NATURE SO ACTION CAN TAKE PLACE! BOYS, GO CLIMB A TREE OR SOMETHING! HECK, JUST JUMP A DITCH! AND GIRLS, JUMP THE DITCH, TOO!
I use a model of teaching narratives that is easy to remember: CSP123. (Character, setting, plot, (1)attempt to solve the problem, (2)another attempt, and (3) problem solved. It's an easy formula; but definitely has to be developed to work. ( I do not claim this formula; but it was taught and I liked it for the nine-year old brain; therefore, I use it).
Me: So, you have all had a special time with a friend. Think about the most exciting place that would be; but, you do know it won't be the mall or in your house playing video games. Right? Right!
And then I modeled most of a narrative. I was thinking of the circus, but a teacher suggested the fair. So, the fair it was.
Characters: Me and Bobby (I always used my imaginary friend, Bobby, when I modeled stories. It was just easier; plus, boys bring a more risky excitement to a story.
Setting: The fair
Problem: One teacher suggested the cows got loose.
"Cows?" That was really hard for me to wrap my brain around it, but eventually, I was able to adapt.
And the teaching began.
"Don't begin your story with 'One hot day." I told the children. "Begin it with dialogue! Catch the reader's interest right off the bat!"
So I modeled.
"Bobby, look over there," I shouted as I pointed to the agricultural corral.
Natural reaction here, please. What would Bobby do? Of course, Bobby turned his head and looked toward the corral. And then the action began. . . the problem . . .the plot.
Well, wouldn't you know it. Five, huge black bulls crashed through the corral gates and chased Bobby and me. Of course we discussed dialogue, such as, "Run!" One child said "Cheese and Crackers!"
Now that was a teachable moment. "What? What do you mean Cheese and Crackers?" The scorers will not know what you mean by that. I taught forty-six years and I don't know what you mean by that . . . and the FCAT scorers are older than me . . . that means they are older than dirt!"
Oh, how I miss teaching! Oh, how I loved teaching today! Well, anyway we had five huge, black bulls chasing me and Bobby in the story and we had to find a way to solve the problem. One person said we could hop on the ferris wheel at the fair; and of course, I said, "Well, you might as well be at the mall because there is NO ACTION on the ferris wheel!"
Poor sad, sad, sad, fourth grade faces. But, they got over it. Then one bright young fellow said, "Hey, we could jump a fence!"
"Brilliant!" I blurted. So that's what Bobby and I did in the story; however, Bobby sailed over the fence; but my pants got snagged, so we had a bigger dilemma. "Help me!" I wailed. Of course, Bobby raced back and unsnagged my pants and we eluded the bulls. (Whew!)
In the end, one fourth grader suggested we run to the hot dog stand, which was wonderful because the five, huge black bulls charged the hot dog stand, sending hot dogs flying into the air. Plus, a few bulls snapped them up in their mouths. Meanwhile, Bobby and I stayed crouched behind the hot dog stand.
Finally, we heard sirens and the SWAT team came and corraled the five, huge black bulls into a corner and we were saved. I think Bobby and I learned not to wear red to the fair again. . . EVER!
Now do you know why I love teaching so much?
And then I came home and began my life as a care-giver.
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